The key is to find the right doc, ask around, look in the internet for your area, ask your primary doc for
a referral. You
need to get help. You
have to be very patient because it is
not a quick fix, it never is. But the wait is worth it.
You are a strong person, I know this because you are still alive and are asking for help.
I know that in your state of depression right now it is even hard to take a shower or get out of bed, no energy, no strength to do the smallest task.