See if he/she will help you with a tapering plan. Do you have someone in your life that knows your situation or that you can come clean with and ask them for help? If so, they can be a part of your taper plan (if thats what you chose)
5-10 30MG oxycodone per day is a lot and I can completely understand why you cave in 36 hours into a cold turkey detox. Im not co-signing and saying that you should continue to use so you can avoid feeling like shhh...
Hello Kimberly,
For me I took it as far as anyone could dare go, on 3-23-10 I was diagnosed with the final stage of cirrhosis. I was 38 at the time. I drank for 20+ years and the last couple of years I was drinking as much as 23 beers a day. At the time of my diagnosis it was the scared look on my wife’s face, the tears on the way home and knowing I let her down. This was something I could not undo.
i agree on working towards a marriage. and in saying that, do you want your partner to push you away if you were married? if you were married you are together thru THICK AND THIN no matter what. and its not right to push the other partner away because of having surgery and your feeling differnet emotions etc. i understand if she feels a lot of different ways and feeling guilty or sad or whatever BUT she needs to TELL you exactly what she's feeling so that you can work thru it TOGETHER.
Seems like you want to really stop but are afraid of the withdrawals and how you will function without them? Just think of a time when you did get everything don and your life was normal without these demon pills...it's what I use when the times get tough; I remember days where i laughed, went places, did things, Sober and back then you dont realize it, but that is TRUE happines; these meds, we're just stuck in clouds waiting for the sun to shine, but it never will....
It's possible. You have to make it a priority and the most important thing in your life. You can't give in no matter what and have to have your mind made up that way from the beginning! I've been through some major medical stuff in the last year, but I made sure my support was there. That's all it took!!!
And one day, you will wake up and find that your heart aches less. And each day will get better. But you have to work at it otherwise you will just keep hurting. I know it doesn't help- but just about everyone has gone through this in their life--and sooner or later it gets better- and you feel you learned something from it. Meanwhile- just don't let your brain and heart work together to bring you down. Get busy--and eventually you will forget about the pain- and find someone else.
One thing may be is that you have to figure out, is what are you hiding from. What is it in your life, in your world that you have to numb out. When you are sober do you simply hate life and the day to day monotomy of everyday living or do you have some hidden demon or sceleton that you are running from. Either case once you have figured that out try to fix THAT particular issue first and then move on from there.
Most functioning addicts can't seem to figure out why we have to quit.
You need to remember how bad being addicted is and forget how good using feels sweetie. Do you remember waking up every morning wondering first where you would get your dope? You didn't have a baby then but let me tell you from first hand experience, using money that your baby needs to buy dope that you need is the worst feeling in the world and only one thing can take that feeling away - more dope! You need love in your life. The emptiness is not from a lack of drugs.
All I can say is there are those who have never had the suboxone experience who chime in with the opinion that those who use suboxone are " not clean". All I can say is you don't get high on subs, you don't crave subs and you don't doctor shop on subs, you just feel normal and it's meant to use as a bridge to sobriety. It serves it's purpose if used properly and i say you absolutely are clean on subs as long as you follow the program...
if you need them because you have a ruptuered disc and your not getting high its ok to do so but your are stilll going to get addicted. if you are physciallly depenedent cause your in real pain then being addcited is what you need but its not neccessarily a bad thing untilll your getttin high and getting our of control and most of the time you kno when your outa control..
s no point and it will only slow your life moving forward. Hour by hour right now. Get through each hour until you reach 120. I remember telling Dixie when she was at hour 36 that she had less that 100 to go. She was in double digits. Now she's at day 6. And I'm at day 15. Live for right now darlin'. Hold tight to you. Know in your mind you are doing this for you. Right now that's all that matters.
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