m about to get upset, I will go for a drive and listen
to music to calm myself. Sometimes you have to separate yourself from the situation to gain composure. Whatever it is that helps you relax, whether it is music, reading, driving, taking a bath, do that whenever you feel things are going to explode. Find some peace, let your heart stop racing, rub your stomach and let your baby know everything is okay, then once you two have calmed down then continue the conversation (if need be).