Agree with the above, but some practical advice -- if going to
massage parlors is causing you anxiety why do you go to
massage parlors? I realize sex is a powerful urge, but that's what real relationships are for. You can self-pleasure. Therapy will take some time to work, and again, completely agree that's what you need to do, but this particular problem is one you can avoid in the meantime. Also, it wouldn't hurt for you to do some homework on what actually causes HIV.