I always tell people that if they cannot see themselves in a gay relationship, kissing the person,
having sex with the same
sex, then how on earth could you be gay? News flash...they are not. I have yet to find one person that has posted on this site about HOCD that I truly thought was gay.
You said you cannot afford a therapist but you also said you are in college and there are counselors you can see at your college for free.