Plus, when they reject you it hurts - I know how that is, believe me. I have 1
friend that I can count on for
anything, but my family, ....not so much.
If you husband doesn't understand that his messiness contributes to your mania, too, start getting rid of the excess - maybe. My ex and I had this problem when we were married and it has come out since we have been divorced (5+ years), that he felt neglected in some way, and was always wanting to spend money, collecting ****, etc.