massage jokes

Hey guys dont get up set over the jokes we can make a FB page and shoot it right back at them haha get even! Better YouTube I can make a video I will do interviews of patients we can all tell our story and SLAM JOAN RIVERS for her uncaring ways my luck she would show up at my front door with a camera and I would be arrested for assalt.

can we post jokes on here. I have a funny one that made me chuckle 2day which I totally needed. I saw on the social side that you can't someone said. Let me know and I will post it.

t come off and my husband started cracking jokes on my cankles lol.. I elevated my feet right away and drank water but is there something else I could do to prevent my feet from swelling like that again?

I was over at my sisters house this evening and one their friends stopped by to pick up their kid, he is a massage therapist and a Louisville, Ky police officer. WOW I thought to myself hmmm I wonder...he was explaining how if you are all stuffy headed he could massage your face and it would release the stuffiness through the nasal cavity, I asked him How about detoxing your body? He said a massage would detox your body by 12%, does anyone know if this is true? Plus from a cops point of view....

I know it's good to have a sense of humor ...but I'm honestly sick of the pregnancy jokes already! Maybe it's because I work around a lot of employees plus I work with the public so it's pretty much constant but I'm so annoyed already and I'm only 27 weeks !!

All the jokes I can think of are filthy and I think Emily would take them down but thanks guys for the laughs!

Does anyone else get offended by jokes that people always make about STDs, particularly herpes? Since I just got diagnosed with herpes I find them very offensive now. My question is should I be offended? And why do people find herpes so funny?

t be afraid to ask questions when booking your appointment or at the beginning of the massage to get a feel for whether or not you have a good massage therapist or esthetician... you have a right to know who is touching you and working on you!

All the massage oils seem to work themselves into the skin way to fast and things dry up, then you have to stop and re-lube everything. Petroleum jelly seems to be too viscous for my liking, but lasts longer. It's also more difficult to clean up, unlike the KY that's water soluble. The gels, like KY (the old stand-by) seem to last pretty long but some have that clinical smell.

So i love my boyfriend and i am so glad he is giving me the blessing of our first child. But sometimes i feel he isn't mature enough to raise a child. The jokes he makes are a bit insulting and he doesnt take it as seriously as i wish he would.. did any other girls have this problem?

Congrats sweety. I'm so proud of your leap of faith. I don't even know you, but I'm so proud. I can tell you, withdrawal is scary, it's uncomfortable, but just know, you'll be fine! It's only a few days of pain for a lifetime of joy and relief. You're just going to be uncomfortable. Unisom to help you get some sleep, and make sure you drink tons of water!!! :3 You go girl, so proud.

I guess preggo jokes aren't a hit on this forum LOLO

t take much seriously. I can make jokes which i know are jokes and others know i am joking. People often laugh at me and when i ask why they are laughing they say that i am being funny but i wasn't trying to be funny. When i ask what is it about me that is funny they just say the way you act and just the way you are. I don't like it, it would be fine if i was trying to be funny but i am not. I don't think if myself as weird or different, so what could be so funny about me?

Hi. For the past few years, I have had shoulder and upper arm pain. The main issue is my hand hurts and the grip is shot, but now I'm starting to suspect it's from my shoulder. Here are some things that I notice that are weird or different on my right side than my left. 1. When I went for massage last year, the therapist has me put my arms behind my back like I'm being arrested (no sick jokes, haha), and then massages the back of my shoulders with her elbows.

i believe its normal this is my first pregnancy and i have had some pain in my hips too. My husband jokes and says my hips look wider and i think hes right.

The reason I post different jokes every now and then is to try to ease the doom and gloom that often pervades this site. We are all human and a little humor can erase some of the low feelings we often get. If these jokes offend anyone I sincerely apologize because that is not my intent..... A nun, badly needing to use the restroom, walked into a local Hooters restaurant. The place was hopping with music and loud conversation and every once in a while the lights would turn off.

I'm 14 and starting to become a sophomore and my gf was makin penis jokes and that got me thinkin bout my penis. Its around 5 1/2 inches when Im erected :/ I cant buy enlargement pills since I dont have a credit and Im too young. Any tips on how I can make my penis grow so I don't have to be all shy and ****?

This process is not immediate and will happen some time in the near future. My inane and not so inane jokes will continue. The main reason that I have made this entry is in order to say that addiction is not the only thing that can disrupt everyday living. No matter were you go there is someone undergoing a change to their lives. The main thing is not to allow addiction, cancer or whatever to knock you down. There is always a tomorrow for all of us. We just have to reach out and grab it.

I have a 3year old neice and a 6 year nephew. I know my nephew has been touched' my neice I recently cough watching dirty videos and now she's telling hwe brother dirty jokes...I ask her and she cryes and shuts down. I'm scared something happened . .I know the signs Cuz I too as a younger child have had more than enough of the bad touch experience. . I told her mom and she just kinda ends the topic right there...

I'll be around to check for your jokes. You come up with some great stuff and always deliver at the right time.

I must reiterate I am looking for sexy play jokes, not get back at someone jokes. You know, kind that makes you know the person is attracted to you ones.

Yesterday i was in our office trying to make jokes to everyone...when i got home that i had dried blood in my fingernail.. and i have a wound near my fingernail. Do i need to be concern in this matter?

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