Insulin is your friend not your enemy. Using
insulin will give you excellent control (
with a bit of learning how to properly use it), along with diet and exercise.
Everyone I have ever talked to with diabetes only say they wish they had started insulin earlier than they actually did.
Don't be afraid. take the plunge and do it. With such high blood sugars, the alternative, of not treating properly, is a sure signing of a death warrant - and one that is probably painful and drawn out.