and your partner is especially unlikely to have HIV, given her testing history etc (and people rarely lie about
HIV status when asked directly). In addition, oral sex is free of
HIV risk, or nearly so; and of course condom protected anal sex isn't risky if the condom doesn't break.
I don't know how the local doc came up with a 17% risk of catching HIV in this situation. My guess is closer to one chance in a million. It is true that if your partner was in the window period, i.e.