Your
fear in this case and perhaps a part
of your depression might be be ways
of dealing with the fact that there's likely unfinished business of some sort from the past, relating to you.
If I were you, I would seek a very good therapist, who practices regression and hypnotherapy, to help you shed some light to this mystery with some explanation and perhaps treat your fear, depression and also your variant of agoraphobia/social anxiety.
Need more details on this, please send me a pm.