I have had this same stuff,I just need to talk and talk so long that it exhaust me,I hate having this ocd ,I am currently in a waiting period of hiv,and guess what is my exposure,a blood draw,I have had a blood draw 37 days ago and even tho I was watching in my mind I somehow got infected.i have had it with this ocd and
fear of hiv and the intrusive thoughts.i sometimes think being dead is better than dealing with this every single day.